Footloose ♪

Hubby and I went to see the new Footloose the other night. It was amazing what a few (or many) years will do to your perspective. When the first Footloose came out (yes, I am THAT old) I identified wholeheartedly with the teens and looked at those parents as ridiculous. As we sat and enjoyed the new movie, I found myself horrified at Ariel's attitude and loose morals. I wondered what Hubby was thinking about the scantily clad actress. I looked over and realized that he was having much the same thoughts as I was. I knew we were both thinking of our sweet little girls at home.

You know you are getting old when although you can remember what it was like to be a teenager, you identify more with the overprotective parents.

Little One on Modesty

I was listening in on a conversation from the backseat between the

two girls. They had the Ariel Barbie and Sunshine asked why her tummy was showing. We have been working to teach our girls about dressing modestly and I have wondered how to handle the competing world views. As I scrambled in my brain to come up with an explanation they could understand and accept, Little One beat me to it with a much better explanation than I was preparing. I was ready to dive into the fact that not everyone has the same standards that we do and the fact that the makers of the doll don't think or believe the same things we do etc etc....

Little One's explanation was perfect. "She is a mermaid and lives in the water. If she wore a long shirt in the water it would get very wet and heavy. When she becomes a girl she covers her tummy."
I need to retrain my brain. Perfect simplicity!

Super not-so-secret identities

Hubby reminded me today of the super identities he gave the boys a few months ago. We still haven't determined whether these identities make them super heroes or super villians. Usually it depends on the state of our sense of humor.  #1 is Captain Obvious and Freckles is his sidekick as Literal Boy!

No Idle Curiosity Here!

Through a couple of  Freckles' recent comments I have realized that I am becoming a true veteran of motherhood. Notice I said "becoming", I don't believe I, or anyone for that matter can know or catch everything their children think or do. 
The other day, while driving on the freeway, we noticed a motorcyclist passing us. Freckles piped up from the back seat and asked us, "Is it against the law for dwarves to ride motorcycles?"  Hubby and I looked at each other, puzzled, and laughing. Then it hit me. We have been having "discussions" lately why he cannot have a minibike. I guess he figured if he was too little to have one then maybe a dwarf would be too little to ride a motorcycle.

A few minutes later, he asked "Could a thorn from a rose bush pop one of the tires on this car?"  Hubby said no. About 30 seconds later I realized we need some elaboration and clarification. I said "But, a nail or any other sharp object will pop a tire, so don't start poking things into the tires or you will really be in trouble!"  Hubby gave me an appreciative glance and said, "Good catch! I thought he was just asking from idle curiosity."

Around here, there is no such thing as idle curiosity!

It Does My Heart Good...

Monday was one of those afternoons. The kids were out of school early, the weather was a little warmer, and mischief was high at our house. Sunshine had been into and out of many things all day and decided that she didn't want to nap. As I was explaining to Little One and her friend why "we shouldn't hit someone over the head with a maraca" Freckles came racing down the stairs yelling that the toilet was clogged. I verified that it was not overflowing yet and so finished my conversation with the girls ("I only apologize to my sister..."), contained Sunshine in her highchair with a snack because like any other toddler, she loves the bathroom, and went to investigate the source of the clog. A clogged toilet, reported by a six year old always makes me nervous about what I might find. This wasn't as bad as it has been in the past. It was clogged with half of the last roll of toilet paper in the house. When the story finally came out, our son had been trying to see how much of the water he could splash out of the toilet by throwing big wads into the bowl. When he attempted to flush, the toilet just couldn't handle the volume and filled within an inch of the rim. After I fished it out and got things running again I continued with my usual afternoon of begging, pleading, cajoling, and bribing the kids to finish homework, set the table, etc, etc.
We began Family Home Evening a little later than I hoped, as usual, but pressed forward nonetheless. Freckles was so excited to read his scripture and did it very well. He is becoming such a good reader. As I explained that we were all going to be secret service agents for the next two weeks, performing acts of service for our family, excitement rose and bubbled over. The kids were so excited they refused to get ready for bed until they had done some things for other members of the family. It is so fun to see them transform from bickering, teasing, annoying, siblings to loving, serving, kind friends. It does my heart good, especially after a hectic day, to see our family lovingly and willingly helping one another. As I looked at each of my sleeping children (some days that's when I love them best), I felt so grateful for all the things I get to experience as a parent. I was especially thankful that those good moments always overshadow the difficult ones.

The Middle Lane of the Parenting Highway

We seem to be in the middle lane of the parenting super highway.

There are those parents in the Right Lane who are just beginning, merging into the chaos and confusion. There are so many worries, so many questions: which diapers, bottles, pediatricians, what should we do now? There are the blissful moments, pulled over on the side of the road while baby naps or is adorably cooing and wrapping those small pudgy fingers around your finger. The rapture at baby's firsts: smile, laugh, steps, words... I can still remember the right lane in a fuzzy, rose colored way. I even get to visit over in the right lane every once in a while, usually when I'm up in the middle of the night for some one on one time with a child. Though the right lane seems peaceful to me now, I wouldn't want to go back. Yes, we really are done! I am content with fond memories to help me remember that I love these crazy kids.

The Middle Lane seems to consist of parents who have multiple growing children. Parents who speed from one place to the next frantically trying to get from point A to point B, C & D in their day. We kiss boo boos and soothe feelings, nag them to make their beds, and try to remember to laugh as the laundry piles ever higher. The worries and questions get bigger: schools, extra-curricular activities, friends, etc. We are no longer questioning the things we did in the beginning. With subsequent children we don't buy brand name, measure formula exactly, wake with every sniffle, or make all baby food from scratch. Not to mention that those multiple children start to get more expensive! (Dear Santa, we would like A Wii, snowboards and lessons, electronic devices etc.) Time is not your own. You have basically given up individuality, hobbies, and selfish desires for the privilege of being somebody's mom or dad! You realize that the little moments of love and joy that happen amid the chaos make it all worth it.

The Left Lane, consisting of parents with teenagers and children leaving home, appears to speed by at an alarming rate. Though I haven't reached this lane yet, I watch my neighbors, siblings, and people in public places. It seems your IQ drops a few points as well as your popularity. And although you have 6 blissful hours (or so it seems to me) during the day to accomplish all those things left unfinished for the last 10 or 15 years when there was still a little person shadowing you, the after school hours seem to be even more jam packed. Increased independence in the form of children getting themselves from point A to point B and hopefully doing their own laundry has it's appeal. However, the worries multiply like rabbits and are big ones: college education, preparing for missions, friends and society with more influence than their old, out of date parents. Boyfriends, girlfriends, and marriages are coming at you head on! The prospect of changing to the left lane makes me shudder with trepidation, nay terror!

As parents speed along in their own lane, they often look at the other parents in neighboring lanes. Those in the Right Lane invariably say, "I will never let my kids do that!" or My kids will never act like that!" We in the Middle Lane, often look at the sweet new parents in the Right Lane with indulgent smiles and chuckle with nostalgic reminiscing about their protective concerns. All the while, those parents in the Left Lane are laughing heartily and somewhat maniacally at our concerns about beds being made, force fed balanced meals, and actually stopping the car to breastfeed.

As for those parents who have pulled off the superhighway of parenting for good, except for tending the grandkids once in a while, I find myself wondering what they think. I tend to think of these matriarchs in two categories, (usually at the grocery store checkout). There are those who seem to sympathize and want to help and cheer those of us still speeding along. Thank you!
Then there are those who seem to have lost all memory of what being a parent on a daily basis was all about. The disapproval in their stance and glare is almost palpable as they watch me go through the agony of keeping my kids from the candy displays. Grocery stores cleverly set these up at the checkout as the last and final torture in the never ending game of "pleeeease can I have?" "Preeety pleeease..." "pleeeease pleeeease pleeease..." Sorry, I got a little side tracked. I digress. I tend to ignore these disapproving folks and pass them off in my mind as never having had children or suffering from post traumatic amnesia brought on by having their own.

If you see us passing or being passed on the superhighway of parenting, honk and wave. You just might make our day!

"They Forgot Thanksgiving"

I had a rather satisfying moment the other day as I walked through WalMart with the kids. As Freckles looked at all of the Christmas decorations that had been put up the day before Halloween, he shook his head and said, "They forgot all about Thanksgiving." This helped me to realize that the thankful lists we made, our thankful tree, and the many Family Home Evening Lessons about gratitude and Thanksgiving had touched them. I am glad I stayed strong in my refusal to put up Christmas decorations until after Thanksgiving, no matter how tempting. I LOVE CHRISTMAS! However much there is to be grateful for at Christmas time, how many people we can serve, and how much thought we put into our gift giving, I want to maintain the importance of a day specifically dedicated to appreciating all the blessings God has given us. Just because the world does not commercialize Thanksgiving, I don't believe it has any less importance. I firmly believe that many problems of the world could be solved with a little more gratitude and less selfishness. If I can teach my children to count their blessings and feel true gratitude, I feel I will have given them a wonderful gift.

"May we be found among those who give our thanks to our Heavenly Father. If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues. Despite the changes which come into our lives and with gratitude in our hearts, may we fill our days—as much as we can—with those things which matter most. May we cherish those we hold dear and express our love to them in word and in deed."
--Thomas S. Monson, "Finding Joy in the Journey", Ensign, Nov 2008, 84–87

What ARE they Thinking?

The other night, one of our boys, who shall remain nameless (but whose name starts with a #1), was watching a friend hitting balls with a golf club. He asked Mom and Dad if he could get his clubs out but, being bedtime the answer was no. Then he saw Little One's bike helmet on the ground and thought "Wow, I could turn Little One upside down and using her helmet as the ball and her head like a golf club, I can hit a long drive!!" Needless to say, he dropped her on her head and tested Mom and Dad's creativity to come up with an appropriate, relevant consequence. He ended up grounded and having to weed a flower bed. (How do you come up with a related consequence for THAT lapse in judgement? :)